7 Signs Your Relationship Is Making You Unhappy

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.
Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.
When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You two don’t spend quality time together anymore

Say you unexpectedly got released early from work on a Friday. Who are the first people you call to hang out? Who are you dying to see? That short list of individuals is who you care about the most. If your so doesn’t make the cut, they may not be as important to you as you tell yourself they are. You can’t be that happy with someone who doesn’t play a significant role in your life.
All couples sometimes hit a point in their relationship when they’re so busy that they don’t spend that much time together. Hopefully this isn’t a regular occurrence, though; having a full schedule is one thing, but not making an effort at all to shift around obligations and hang out is a different beast entirely — one that could mean you don’t really dig your so like you used to.
You need to communicate your feelings to your partner, and either work on the things that make you feel unhappy, or go your separate ways if the problems can’t be resolved. Unhappy relationships can drag on for years, but they don’t have to.

2. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.
However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.
If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.
When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.
You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

3. You have lost yourself

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.
If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.
You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.
If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

4. You don’t feel sexually attracted to your partner anymore

Like Samantha used to say on HBO’s $.e.x and the City, s.e.x is a pretty good barometer to judge the state of your relationship. Not ever wanting to be physically intimate with your so usually means trouble. “A drop in physical touch is also a sign that the relationship could be on the rocks,” Blush life coach Kali Rogers told Bustle. Ask yourself if this is merely a rut you’re stuck in, or whether you’re just not s.e.x.ually attracted to your partner anymore.

5. Constantly think about life without your loved one

But this is exactly the beginning of the end. Do you constantly think about how to end your relationship? What about just disappearing and never coming back? Many do so, but it’s just disgusting. And so many diverge. But, if you can imagine your life without your partner, then what are you waiting for?
If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you don’t enjoy being with your partner and you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.
Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.
Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.
Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.
If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You complain to your partner about the smallest things

Carlyle Jansen, relationship expert and author of $.e.x Yourself: The Woman’s Guide to Mastering Masturbation and Achieving Powerful Orgasms, told Bustle, “If your partner is nitpicky and cranky at the smallest thing, they are likely unhappy and often not saying anything directly.” Now turn that around on yourself: if you’re always badgering your so about the way they do the dishes or how they hang their washing, there’s likely something more fundamental about your love life that you aren’t addressing. Put the complaining aside and think seriously about whether you’re content in this relationship.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.
You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.
When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.
Sources: bustle.com, betterme.guru, lifehack.org